Words.

And what if I die tonight?

The question is rendered to be unrealistic now, but seemed so real just a short time ago. 

Listening, listening, listening to the words of the people that I should trust. 

Hearing the same thing over and over, things like, "it's just a bad day" "it's just a bad week" "it's just a bad month" "its just a bad year". 

The words, they said all the wrong things. 

It didn't matter who said them, 

the words were just wrong. 

Too long have I been reading the words of people that are dead or dying, and not the words of someone that is alive. 

And to this point, I wonder if I was dying, or if I was alive. 

I wonder if my words spoke life into you. 

I wonder if the words that come from my finger tips say the things that the words just didn't say to me. 

I just wanna be caressed and hear the words say, "hey baby, it's gonna be ok."

Sometimes I wanna hear the words say, "sit down boy and take a listen. when are you gonna do it right?"

Sometimes I wanna hear the damn words say, "you fool."

-

I wish the words could have just told me I was wrong. 

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And as the tears slip off my cheeks and slam into the keyboard like atomic bombs, 

I wanna hear the words say "this life, it's real, and you're here"

But they haven't yet.

And sometimes I wanna hear the words say "you're alive"

But up to this point, the words haven't said a thing. 

All they've said is "you're dying"

And then it's all real again. 

"it's just a bad day"